Life as I knew it has gone. My new life has been in progress since the end of October. So goodbye to my childhood home of 17 years, I will never return there again for its now being rented to someone else. Goodbye to being a sales adviser as my training as a team leader has begun. Goodbye to not having to look after myself. I’ve slowly began to teach myself how to cope alone. Goodbye to childhood I’m now attempting to be a semi-responsible adult. Goodbye to simplicity. Goodbye old life. You have faded into this thing which seems like a dream. It doesn’t feel like it’s my life, I’m waiting to wake up from this dream. I also passed my driving theory somehow. So I’m well on my way to gutpunching 2014. Hell I’ve gutpunched it more than I expected to already. But I won’t stop. I need to keep up the momentum.
I had great news that when reviewed on my customer service that I didn’t put a foot wrong and delivered exceptional customer service. When I first started my job I nearly had a panic attack on the tills and I wanted to curl in a ball and cry. So to hear that the progress I’ve made is that huge is just so relieving to hear. It helps confirm that I am making progress. That I’m not fighting a losing battle. The battle I’m fighting to rebuild my confidence isn’t futile. I am winning it. Its more than I expected to achieve. I just need to carry on regardless of how difficult it is. Regardless of how much I want to curl up in bed and give up on it all. I can have pretty much everything I want providing I don’t quit fighting for it. I just need to remember that all the time. I have all the tools I need, I can use them to forge my future, I just can’t give up on my goals because they’re not in sight at the moment.
So goodbye to life as I knew it. But hello to new beginnings.
The Goddamn Gutpuncher 